Funny

"You want me to be a man,older than you, who goes by the name of Roullard."

"Your perception is riveting, Amal," he says in a bored and sarcastic tone, dropping the note down on my desk. "It's comforting to know that there are people in my class who have the maturity and intelligence to make derogatory comments about other people's external appearances."Now what am I supposed to say to that"What do you have to say for yourself"Friggin' mind reader."

"I never knew how much I missed pickles and pickle juice. It's like, an overwhelming feeling that I can't even explain."

"All I wanted for Christmas was a New Years Eve party that I would never forget. Too bad I got too drunk to remember it."

"Randy lay there like a slug. It was his only defense."

"Seven smirked as he walked back over to me. "I gave you catharsis last night. Twice."

"I live on shameless flattery...and vodka...but the two usually go hand in hand."

"She wore so much thick white makeup in order to conceal her naturally rosy complexion that if she turned around suddenly her face would probably end up on the back of her head."

"Totally drained he could only manage one but he made it a good one tongue included. “Delicious ” he murmured. “So depraved ” Colton muttered. “Thank you.” “Get off me.” “Mine ” “Stings.” “Boohoo."

"so this crow comes and it starts quacking at us."

"I handed him a beaker and toyed with the pleats of my skirt. The folds kept rippling against my knees in a distracting way. It was one of Naomi's additions to my wardrobe. I quickly decided that I hated it."

"Ladies pick funny things to be proud of."

"According to the fortune-cookie logic most people live by, the best things in life are free. That's crap. I have a gold-plated robot that scratches the exact part of my back where my hands can't reach, and it certainly wasn't free."

"The inside is packed with people. Lots of them crowding the bar, passing drinks back for people to carry to tables. A bunch of guys are pouring shots of vodka."To Zacharov!" one toasts."To open hearts and open bars!" calls another."And open legs," says Anton."

"Look, I'm a guy. Your ass was touching my groin. Of course I'm going to pop a boner. It's a natural reaction."

"Stupid Romanian bloodsucker. He was lucky I hadn't bestowed another exalted scar on his imperial body."

"In my opinion, all boyfriends should turn out to be secretly wealthy."

"You guys dated, didn’t you?”“Are you insane? Not even if the continuation of our kind depended on it would I be tempted to do something so awful."

"Let come the forces of night! We will stand!" "We will get the hell out of here is what we will do," I muttered."

"Fifteen minutes later, a meeting was called. "Okay, look." Deb's face was dead serious. "I know I just joined this project, and I don't want to offend anyone. But I'm going to be honest. I think you've been going about this all wrong." "I'm offended," Dave told her flatly."