Humor

"I don’t want to talk about it,” she said. Once again he was close. Too close. So damn close. “At all,” she added, hearing with some alarm that her voice had softened. Everything had softened, at just his proximity. “Ever,” she whispered, and found her gaze locked on his mouth. He had a really great mouth."

"...truly loving someone is making that person happy even if you’re not the reason behind it."

"This damn ring had derailed her life. No wonder Gollum had gone insane."

"You know what you are, Sam Brody" she whispered, wrapping her arms around his neck. "A big, fat tease." They both knew there wasn't an ounce of fat on him. They also both knew exactly what she meant."

"I made a tactical error tonight with Wyatt." She paused "Horizontally." Sara laughed. "Again?"

"Besides, there's nobody who is going to watch your back better than me. You know that. And that's why I'm going to be there with you, whenever there is, whenever you ask, and as long as I'm able, he said. It's what fathers do. Most father's don't show up with hand grenades and bowie knives. They should be ashamed of themselves, Jake said."

"The only thing he was sorry for was slamming the door and perhaps raising his voice to the woman who'd been like a mother to him since the passing of his parents. Perhaps she hadn't really deserved his reaction, but he was, justifiably, weary of their meddling and hearing about his father's will. Apparently no suitable maiden was going to appear on his doorstep. He seemed to be looking for a needle in a haystack."

"Princess, the contents of your shoe closet would break the budgets of a lot of third world countries - Jake Malone"

"Cal opened another cabinet and removed a bottle of anti-inflammatory tablets, placing them on the table in front of her along with the ice pack he snagged from the freezer. She glanced at him, suspicious. “What’s this?” “The drug I offer to all of my victims to make them more compliant. It’s ibuprofen,” he said when she glared at him. “It’ll help with the pain and hopefully keep the swelling down. As will the ice. Do you need help taking your boots off?”“So that it’ll be more difficult for me to run away when you bring out your collection of shrunken human heads?”“Now you’re catching on."

"We all have our handicaps. You're not mine."

"He didn’t know what was hotter, her Star Wars reference or the breathiness with which she spoke it."

"He could be doing quantum physics in his head or undressing her in his mind—she’d never know the difference."

"E. L. James. Best damn author of our time, if you ask me. She really nailed it with that tampon scene. Pure enlightenment."

"Leave it to you to find a legal way to do something illegal (Candler)"

"Because sometimes in life, Ken didn't always choose Barbie. (Jane Alcott)"

"She’s drunk dialing contractors ” Chloe said to Tara. “Someone should stop her."

"They didn't just live with secrets. Secrecy surrounded their entire lives."

"No. No more surprises. No more secrets. Or so help me, I will rip off your own leg and beat you with it."

"Why, if you only knew the secrets to which I'm p"

"But the aspect of secrets is they leak out. If they didn't leak, they wouldn't be interesting."