P. J. O'Rourke

P. J. O'Rourke

"I think it's been hard for people to understand how Islam can be a good religion, and yet the Islamists are evil. Those of us who have had experience with Islam understand this, just as we understand the difference between snake handlers and people going to church on Sunday morning."
111 Quotes
"I think it's been hard for people to understand how Islam can be a good religion, and yet the Islamists are evil. Those of us who have had experience with Islam understand this, just as we understand the difference between snake handlers and people going to church on Sunday morning."
P. J. O'Rourke
"Little islands of human happiness, peace, and prosperity are so exceptional at this point in history that I'm not even sure we can draw lessons from them."
P. J. O'Rourke
"If death weren't around to 'finalize' the Darwinian process, we'd all still be amoebas."
P. J. O'Rourke
"If we heard that somebody starved to death in Sweden or Switzerland, we would be shocked."
P. J. O'Rourke
"I blame feminism and Facebook for the death of the American automobile. I'm a Republican, so I blame everything on feminism - or commies."
P. J. O'Rourke
"Always read something that will make you look good if you die in the middle of it."
P. J. O'Rourke
"In our brief national history we have shot four of our presidents, worried five of them to death, impeached one and hounded another out of office. And when all else fails, we hold an election and assassinate their character."
P. J. O'Rourke
"The problem with public school is not overcrowding in the classroom. The problem is not teacher unions. The problem is not underfunding or lack of computer equipment. The problem is your damn kids."
P. J. O'Rourke
"Let's reintroduce corporal punishment in the schools - and use it on the teachers."
P. J. O'Rourke
"To mistrust science and deny the validity of scientific method is to resign your job as a human. You'd better go look for work as a plant or wild animal."
P. J. O'Rourke
"A very quiet and tasteful way to be famous is to have a famous relative. Then you can not only be nothing, you can do nothing too."
P. J. O'Rourke
"Don't send funny greeting cards on birthdays or at Christmas. Save them for funerals, when their cheery effect is needed."
P. J. O'Rourke
"Computers seem a little too adaptively flexible, like the strange natives, odd societies, and head cases we study in the social sciences. There's more opposable thumb in the digital world than I care for; it's awfully close to human."
P. J. O'Rourke
"A 'farm' today means 100,000 chickens in a space the size of a Motel 6 shower stall."
P. J. O'Rourke
"Space has always been confusing to politics."
P. J. O'Rourke
"The words 'Space Age' have a quaint, nostalgic tone - sitting on midcentury modern furniture watching 'The Jetsons."
P. J. O'Rourke
"Obama's space policy doesn't differ much from George W. Bush's."
P. J. O'Rourke
"What Alexander Graham Bell thought up occupied less space than a flower vase. Now it's so small that I have to search all my pockets to discover I've received a spam text."
P. J. O'Rourke
"There are a few things that people all around the world need to admit to themselves. Trade restraints slow economic growth, the euro is not a reserve currency, and scoreless sports ties are boring."
P. J. O'Rourke
"When I was fifteen, I dreamed of living in the big city, as many a young person does if he is artistic and sensitive. By 'artistic and sensitive' I mean short, skinny, unkissed, bad at sports, and carrying a C average in high school."
P. J. O'Rourke
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