Demetri Martin
"But I found that disappointing people is a good thing, because disapproval is freedom."
27 Quotes
"But I found that disappointing people is a good thing, because disapproval is freedom."
"لكنني وجدت أن خذلان الناس أمر حسن، لأن عدم رضاهم هو الحرية."
Demetri Martin
"I think it's interesting that 'cologne' rhymes with 'alone."
"أجد من المثير للاهتمام أن "عطر" تتناغم مع "وحدة"."
Demetri Martin
"I like video games, but they are very violent. I want to create a video game in which you have to help all the characters who have died in the other games. 'Hey, man, what are you playing' 'Super Busy Hospital. Could you leave me alone? I'm performing surgery! This guy got shot in the head, like, 27 times!"
"أحب ألعاب الفيديو، لكنها عنيفة جدًا. أريد أن أصنع لعبة فيديو عليك فيها مساعدة جميع الشخصيات التي ماتت في الألعاب الأخرى. "يا رجل، ماذا تلعب؟" "مستشفى فائق الانشغال. هل يمكنك أن تتركني وشأني؟ أنا أجري عملية جراحية! هذا الرجل أصيب في رأسه 27 مرة!"
Demetri Martin
"Stand-up is like a row boat: it's fun and romantic when you're choosing to do it. But if you have no other choice than to be in a row boat it's not as enjoyable that's survival."
"الكوميديا الارتجالية أشبه بقارب التجديف: ممتعة ورومانسية حين تختارها. أما إذا لم يكن لك خيار سوى أن تكون في قارب تجديف، فلا متعة فيها، بل هي مجرد نجاة."
Demetri Martin
"I think since I was kid people told me that they thought I was funny."
"أظن أن الناس، منذ طفولتي، كانوا يخبرونني بأنهم يرونني مضحكًا."
Demetri Martin
"I think a lot of stuff I find funny is from day dreaming."
"أظن أن الكثير مما يضحكني ينبع من أحلام اليقظة."
Demetri Martin
"If you can't tell a spoon from a ladle, then you're fat!"
"إذا لم تميز الملعقة من المغرفة، فأنت سمين!"
Demetri Martin
"I wanna make a jigsaw puzzle that's 40,000 pieces. And when you finish it, it says 'go outside."
"أرغب في صنع أحجية من أربعين ألف قطعة. وحين تكتمل، تقول: "اخرج إلى العالم"."
Demetri Martin
"I like women, but you can't always trust them. Some of them are big liars, like this one woman I met who had a dog. I asked her her dog's name and then I asked, 'Does he bite' and she said, 'No.' And I said, 'So how does he eat' Liar!"
"أنا أميل إلى النساء، غير أن الثقة بهن ليست مضمونة على الدوام. فبعضهن كاذبات ماهرات، كواحدة التقيتها وكانت تقتني كلبًا. سألتها عن اسم كلبها، ثم استفسرت: "هل يعض؟" فأجابت: "لا." فقلت متعجبًا: "إذًا، كيف يأكل؟" يا لكِ من كاذبة!"
Demetri Martin
"I'd love to win trophies, be in movies, have a body of work I'm proud of and find a way to enjoy it along the way. Success is probably a more of a complicated thing than that."
"أطمح للفوز بالجوائز، والظهور في الأفلام، وأن أمتلك رصيداً من الأعمال أفتخر به، وأن أجد سبيلاً للاستمتاع بكل ذلك في غضون الرحلة. لعل النجاح أمراً أكثر تعقيداً من هذا بكثير."
Demetri Martin
"The digital camera is a great invention because it allows us to reminisce. Instantly."
"إن الكاميرا الرقمية اختراع عظيم لأنها تمكننا من استعادة الذكريات. على الفور."
Demetri Martin
"And my only rule being if when I wake in the morning I'm looking forward to the things that I have to do that day, then I'm on the right track."
Demetri Martin
"I think that when you get dressed in the morning, sometimes you're really making a decision about your behavior for the day. Like if you put on flipflops, you're saying: 'Hope I don't get chased today.' 'Be nice to people in sneakers."
Demetri Martin
"I like to use 'I Can't Believe it's Not Butter' on my toast in the morning, because sometimes when I eat breakfast, I like to be incredulous. How was breakfast? Unbelievable."
Demetri Martin
"I wrapped my Christmas presents early this year, but I used the wrong paper. See, the paper I used said 'Happy Birthday' on it. I didn't want to waste it so I just wrote 'Jesus' on it."
Demetri Martin
"I used to play sports. Then I realized you can buy trophies. Now I am good at everything."
Demetri Martin
"I think it would be cool if you were writing a ransom note on your computer, if the paper clip popped up and said, 'Looks like you're writing a ransom note. Need help? You should use more forceful language, you'll get more money."
Demetri Martin
"I love women, but I feel like you can't trust some of them. Some of them are liars, you know? Like I was in the park and I met this girl, she was cute and she had a dog. And I went up to her, we started talking. She told me her dog's name. Then I said, 'Does he bite' She said, 'No.' And I said, 'Oh yeah? Then how does he eat' Liar."
Demetri Martin
"But what I was going to say was, I just figured I'm going to go boldly in the direction of my dreams, say it as Thoreau would say, and just see where it takes me."
Demetri Martin
"My favorite fruit is grapes. Because with grapes, you always get another chance. 'Cause, you know, if you have a crappy apple or a peach, you're stuck with that crappy piece of fruit. But if you have a crappy grape, no problem - just move on to the next. 'Grapes: The Fruit of Hope."
Demetri Martin
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