Tim O'Rourke, Wolf House - Potter's Story
"I prodded him in the chest with a finger and said, “Look here, smart mouth, I’m getting pretty sick of you already. If you know what’s best for you, keep your trap shut and do as I tell you. I still haven’t forgotten how you pushed my friend into that corpse. So unless you want to end up like that body in the underpass, do yourself a favour and keep out of my face, okay?”“Whatever you say, boss. You’re the boss, boss,” Drake said.“See, there you go again!” I snapped at him.“I’m not sure I know what you mean, boss,” Drake said.“You even say boss like a wise arse,” I shot back at him.“I don’t know what you mean b-” Drake started again.“Did I say you had to call me boss?”“It’s just that I thought…”“Don’t think!” I barked. “Just do as I say and we’ll get along just fine.”“Whatever you say,” Drake said. I glanced at Madison and she was smiling. “What’s so funny?” I asked.“Nothing,” she smiled back.“Oh, I’m sorry,” I said. “I didn’t realise that I was some sort of freaking comedian. Let’s see ifyou think it’s so funny when another one of those dead kids shows up. Jesus, no wonder you amateurs haven’t caught this piece of scum yet – you’re probably all too busy sitting round cracking jokes andtaking the piss to do any real police work.”“You are funny though,” she half-laughed. “It’s just that when you get angry, your jaw goes alltense and your nostrils flare out at the sides.”“Oh yeah, how very amusing,” I remarked. “I think you two clowns are funny – not ha-ha funny– but fucked-in-the-head funny! Now, if you two have quite finished doing your Laurel and Hardy impersonations, we’ve got a killer to catch!"
1 Quotes
"I prodded him in the chest with a finger and said, “Look here, smart mouth, I’m getting pretty sick of you already. If you know what’s best for you, keep your trap shut and do as I tell you. I still haven’t forgotten how you pushed my friend into that corpse. So unless you want to end up like that body in the underpass, do yourself a favour and keep out of my face, okay?”“Whatever you say, boss. You’re the boss, boss,” Drake said.“See, there you go again!” I snapped at him.“I’m not sure I know what you mean, boss,” Drake said.“You even say boss like a wise arse,” I shot back at him.“I don’t know what you mean b-” Drake started again.“Did I say you had to call me boss?”“It’s just that I thought…”“Don’t think!” I barked. “Just do as I say and we’ll get along just fine.”“Whatever you say,” Drake said. I glanced at Madison and she was smiling. “What’s so funny?” I asked.“Nothing,” she smiled back.“Oh, I’m sorry,” I said. “I didn’t realise that I was some sort of freaking comedian. Let’s see ifyou think it’s so funny when another one of those dead kids shows up. Jesus, no wonder you amateurs haven’t caught this piece of scum yet – you’re probably all too busy sitting round cracking jokes andtaking the piss to do any real police work.”“You are funny though,” she half-laughed. “It’s just that when you get angry, your jaw goes alltense and your nostrils flare out at the sides.”“Oh yeah, how very amusing,” I remarked. “I think you two clowns are funny – not ha-ha funny– but fucked-in-the-head funny! Now, if you two have quite finished doing your Laurel and Hardy impersonations, we’ve got a killer to catch!"
"دفعتُ صدره بإصبعي وقلت: "اسمع يا صاحب اللسان السليط، لقد سئمتُ منك بالفعل. إن كنتَ تعرف مصلحتك، فأغلق فمك وافعل ما أقوله لك. لم أنسَ بعد كيف دفعتَ صديقي نحو تلك الجثة. لذا، إن لم تكن تريد أن تلقى مصير تلك الجثة في النفق، فافعل لنفسك معروفًا وابتعد عن وجهي، مفهوم؟"
قال دريك: "أمرك يا سيدي. أنت الآمر الناهي، سيدي."
فصحتُ به: "ها أنت ذا تفعلها مجددًا!"
قال دريك: "لا أدري ما تقصد يا سيدي."
رددتُ عليه: "حتى كلمة 'سيدي' تقولها بأسلوب المتذاكي."
بدأ دريك مرة أخرى: "لا أدري ما تقصد بـ..."
"هل قلتُ لك أن تناديني 'سيدي'؟"
"ظننتُ فحسب..."
"لا تفكر!" زجرتُه. "افعل ما أقوله لك وسنتفق تمامًا."
قال دريك: "أمرك."
نظرتُ إلى ماديسون وكانت تبتسم. سألتُ: "ما المضحك؟"
ابتسمتْ هي الأخرى وقالت: "لا شيء."
قلتُ: "آه، آسف. لم أدرك أنني نوع من المهرجين اللعينين. لنرَ إن كنتِ ستجدين الأمر مضحكًا عندما تظهر جثة طفل ميت آخر. يا إلهي، لا عجب أنكم أيها الهواة لم تمسكوا بهذا الوغد بعد – ربما أنتم جميعًا مشغولون جدًا بالجلوس وتبادل النكات والسخرية عن القيام بأي عمل شرطي حقيقي."
قالت وهي تضحك نصف ضحكة: "أنت مضحك حقًا. الأمر فقط أنك عندما تغضب، يتصلب فكك وتنتفخ فتحتا أنفك من الجانبين."
علّقتُ: "آه أجل، كم هو مسلٍ للغاية. أعتقد أنكما أيها المهرجان مضحكان – ليس مضحكًا يثير الضحك – بل مضحكًا يثير الجنون! الآن، إن كنتما قد انتهيتما من تقليد لوريل وهاردي، فلدينا قاتل لنمسك به!"
Tim O'Rourke, Wolf House - Potter's Story
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